I came to seeing that basketball isn't the only thing out there in life. It also takes a lot of studying time out of your hands and if your like me where you have to reread and reread in order to understand something it takes you more than an hour a day to get it. I have came to facing a dilemma a dilemma that might consist regret in the future, sadness when the time comes, and or anything possible it might of been the best decision ever made in my life.
" I don't know you as someone who just quits in the middle of something you just were never that type of person." My little cousin writes to me in a text message. These past couple of days I have been okay. But, once again the fear of thought of letting go comes rushing through my head. I came to peace that there will never be another team that will replace the memories I have created in Holbrook simply because we were all so close. But, college now thats a different story. I no longer push myself to be the best I can be. I no longer run as fast as I use to. I no longer motivate myself unless I know for a fact that I'm going home that weekend and push myself in practice so I can leave to go home.
It has been bothering me for quite some time now. Simply, because I'm afraid that I do give up what people will think of me. What I will feel at the end of everything. But, yet basketball is taking over things I could be doing. Tutoring others at The Rock which is down the street, it's taking the time of calling my family because I'm to tired because I still have homework, it's taking away my study time, it's taking away my self discovery, it's taking away the opportunity of getting extra credit in exams I may fail.
My mind spins in circles, but, whatever God has planned for me I know he'll show me at the end of this week because he will bring me to peace with the main decision and will direct me in the right path. I truly miss back home and hope they know that but I guess this is my time now and what makes me happy. I can either stick it out for a year and watch my future disappear because of grades or I can stop and focus on the main goals decisions will never leave they'll just keep approaching every time it can. So do what makes you happy because at the end it is your life and nothing should be keeping you away from smiling not even decisions about who you once were.
